On the road to happiness and freedom

Attraction and repulsion create movement in life, just like attachment and detachment.

When I first noticed those movements in me, I wondered if I had an attachment disorder. I completely forgot that this is how nature works, including the nature in me. It is easy to judge natural reactions as wrong if they feel uncomfortable and perhaps also cause discomfort in others. But what is really wrong and in relation to what and who and when, when there is no standard development for a human life?

It took me a long time to accept these mechanisms and see them for what they are; a sensation that leads to a movement in me and thus in life.

Before I came to a more loving understanding of these movements, I had to go through fear, which I have learned often precedes deeper insights. Fear has become my friend, even though it feels uncomfortable while it is happening. Now I know that there are often great gifts waiting on the other side once it has let go. Fear blinded me to seeing and following those movements from a place of love.

Detachment is an English word for letting go of attachment or binding to something or someone. It is a consciousness-expanding process that occurs continuously throughout life. Attachment is given from birth in the sense that we are one with and connected to the source from which we originate. Furthermore, we are attached to life in the body as long as we live, regardless of whether we are aware of it or not. Through detachment from what we experience in the body-mind, we can recognize our original nature. We can also experience it spontaneously when we are absolutely present within ourselves or with something or someone we are very attracted to. Attraction and repulsion are in this way natural movements in life that support experiences of attachment and detachment.

Attraction and repulsion are e.g. at play when we fall in love and break up. Attachment and detachment are experienced e.g. if you have children and release them again to their adult lives and perhaps a new partner. Smoking, drinking, eating, loving, exercising, working and relaxing are other forms of attraction and repulsion that can lead to attachment and detachment. All are movements in life that we can accept, condemn or deny depending on what we have been taught.

Sometimes we get stuck in one thing or another, which freezes the movement for a while in the situation, person or relationship. When the stuckness feels sufficiently uncomfortable/repulsive, the movement starts again. The same thing happens if we become aware of what is at stake and are able to let go of the attachment. Even if we may be aware of a bond to something or someone, it is far from always possible to let go of it, and who says we should? Often the desire to let go of something is exactly what is holding us back.

There is often anxiety associated with the loss of identity/roles/functions/people/, indeed anything one may be attached to, and the body can react as if it were physical death. Anxiety can therefore easily prevent us from being more free and at peace with life and happy in it.

There are many paths to freedom and happiness through attraction and repulsion, none of which last forever. Lasting happiness and freedom may be found at the end of the tunnel, in letting go of the fear of death, and in the recognition of our innate attachment.